Author: Thegreatestislove
Posted: Fri May 17, 2013 3:09 am
MovieMaker1
Thanks. I noticed that you are a longtime member to this forum, so I am sure you have heard the suboxone subutex story a lot. I do genuinely wonder why malaruri86 had such a terrible withdrawal experience. I can’t help but to think it was simply because the length of treatment and fast taper were not sufficient for this addict to achieve any type of mental stability before discontinuing the Subs. My thoughts on Suboxone therapy go like this…. Some need lifetime maintenance on suboxone to stay safe, and sober. Some need a good doctor preferably a Psychiatrist who prescribes Suboxone and is an addictionologist and can make the decision that at some stable point during treatment the patient is ready to face some un comfortable withdrawals, but can discontinue the suboxone successfully. This must be the choice of the patient. The patient who chooses to taper and discontinue must be ready, any sub doc worth their salt will tell you that it takes a year to two years for almost all addicts to find stability and get their head on somewhat straight. Getting past the guilt. shame, and problems caused by active addiction takes a considerable amount of time. Surely, three to five months is not long enough to accomplish those most important goals in recovery.
I consider Suboxone therapy to be a great tool in treating addiction. For many or most addicts it is lifesaving. I would much rather see an addicted friend taking suboxone to aid in their recovery than to be attending their funeral because, That ONE time they just took it too far. For us addicts we KNOW, that One time can mean the difference between life and death. Not to mention the many other ways a person can see an early grave because of addiction. The bad places we will take ourselves into because we need to score some tabs could mean rape, or worse facing an addict more displaced than seems human, for whatever reason thinking taking the life of another addict is just a way to get a cool rush. As sick and disturbing as that may sound, it has happened, and will continue to happen as long as addiction exists. Too often addicts simply forget how horrible active addiction was for them. They forget the fact that they reduced themselves to people and places they would not dare visit just so they could acquire enough opiates to last a few more days. It is amazing to me to this very day, three years into Suboxone therapy, some of the extreme chances I was willing to take just to score opiates when I was actively using. I really did become someone else, a person I did not recognize. My addiction had complete control over me. That is what addiction does, that is the definition of addiction to me. Obsession for something that is so powerful over every thought, every action. We are powerless to addiction. I think it is important for people to remember that feeling of powerlessness. The feeling of shame, lonelyness, self-pity, low self esteem and the loss of accountability with the people in our lives who REALLY matter because our addiction made us believe the most important person was the person who had our fix for the next few days no matter that the person who has what we are looking for could also be the same person who is thinking about killing us or robbing us, or could quite possibly be our ticket straight into a lifetime of legal troubles. It’s the addiction that gives us the courage to take that chance. To take a chance on our very lives. Is it courage? Is that the right word? No, it should be said the addiction makes us weak enough to be willing to take that chance. Although it is important to remember the shame, Suboxone gives us that wonderful opportunity to re-enter the land of the living. A chance to right some wrongs and get back to normal living without having to worry about enough dope to get through the week. It gives us the chance to fix our broken relationships and be able to make some promises we can actually keep. It gives us a chance to get to know ourselves again, to remember we do not have to be reduced to making ourself a friend to the enemy. It also if taken for a sufficient amount of time, takes away some of the memory of the euphoria that full agonists provide therefore reducing the cravings for the people who do decide to taper and discontinue suboxone. If a person does not have time to acheive these things then withdrawal from anything will be a nightmare for them. Afterall, our attitude is 90% of reality RIGHT?
Overall, being the addict who has chosen the route of tapering and discontinuing I will never ever say that I regret Suboxone therapy. Am I afraid of the withdrawals I will feel when I stop, YES, of course I am afraid of withdrawals, but I believe with all my heart that because I have been on the program for a sufficient time and because I have nt cheated on my taper by taking larger doses here and there like many people do. I believe that when that day comes to be off the very last dose, I may not be feeling like superwoman, but I can hold my head high knowing that I have done everything I could to overcome my addiction and that once my own receptors start back doing their magic I will be strong enough to stay far away from opiates. Sometimes it takes walking through the thorns to get to the roses, and NOW I CAN see the forest and the trees. I have great hope and if it had not been for Suboxone therapy and my wonderful Psychiatrist, I will call her Dr.G, I would not be where I am today. Suboxone gave me this chance, and I dare NOT look a gift horse in the mouth. I am scared, but i’m hopeful. I am better today than I was yesterday, and we shall see where the story goes from here.