Author: qhorsegal2

Posted: Thu May 23, 2013 7:46 am

Hi Honeybun,

I’m so happy for you that you have such a good doctor! I think that will make it much easier for you…It’s so great to have a doctor who is compassionate!

Just take it one day at a time. I bet you won’t start to feel much different for awhile. And maybe by the time you get to that point you will feel a bit more confident. As I said before, when I first started my taper I screwed up alot and I was scared to death. Then at some point is just clicked and it was a whole different ballgame. I’m sure you will have that moment too.

I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother. I am really close to my grandma too. The difference is she lives 2000 miles away from me. I recently went to stay with her for a month after she fell and broke her arm. It was a great time that I will always treasure. I hope I will get to see her again, but she is 76 years old and in bad health, and if I don’t see her again at least I know I had that time with her to show her how much I love her.

And your son is graduating!!!! Congratulations!!!! I know that has to be hard. My oldest, a girl, just turned 13 this month and it was a big wake up call. I have a TEENAGER now! I don’t even want to think how soon she will be gone…it’s sad. But think of it this way, it shows how well you have done your job as a Mom. Our greatest achievement is when we see our little ones doing well and becoming independant, responsible adults. I know…easier said than done huh?

Keep positive Honey, you are going to do great!

Author: raudy1975

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 10:05 am

Hi eric,

I was totally doing the same as you. I had 18months of clean time but, I was considering getting back on Suboxone. And I did. It was a mental thing for me. I just knew that I was an addict and I was always going to be one. Even though I had this clean time, I too was pondering suboxone. I think I knew that I was not depressed on it. I was happier, because i didn’t have any opiate cravings on it. It truly is a miracle drug to help treat this shitty disease of addiction.

Author: isaydig

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 1:32 pm

Beautiful Disaster,

Thanks for the kind words…I know we’re in the same boat, but have you ever tried to work through the 12 steps with a sponsor? The fifth step is where i felt the most relief from all the years of guilt, shame and remorse…and resentments that ate my lunch on a daily basis.

If you’re interested in Buddhist philosophy in relation to recovering from addiction check out Darren Litttljohn’s book called ‘The 12 Step Buddhist"…and there are tons of other books for people who have a hard time with Christianity or religion (like me). Buddhism is perfect for me. The Buddha even told his students that if anything he said didn’t jive with their beliefs, then just ignore those particular teachings. THAT’S what hooked me. i could take what helped me and leave the rest behind until i was ready to take another look at it, or not.

Good luck. I can tell you have a huge heart <3

Author: tinydancer

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 2:11 pm

Hey seasonasdad,

I’m glad you’re at peace with your decision. Some working environments have a tendency to really wear us down after a while. Change can be a good thing! I hope you find something new that you can take pride in and supervisors that appreciate you more for your efforts.

Good luck and keep us posted!

Author: MovieMaker1

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 5:33 pm

What are you talking about Tiny? :-

Anyways. I’m glad you liked the post. It doesn’t happen overnight by any means and builds overtime. Just start simple. Start small.

Glad you enjoyed my posts though. I swear by it because combined with suboxone it is one of the biggest things that changed my life after so much trial and error in recovery.

Author: TeeJay

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 7:17 pm

Hey Mike.

If you’re wanting to stop Subs, using it only to detox, the sooner the better. I won’t get into success rates of Sub-based detoxes because it’s clear you’ve got your heart set on short-term treatment only.

When I’ve done Suboxone based detoxes as an inpatient, the regimen stopped after 5-6 days. Sub was only taken to relieve withdrawal symptoms from the drug-of-choice, in my case heroin. Keeping dosing to only 5-6 days prevented from becoming dependent on Suboxone, but it was taken long enough to relieve the heroin withdrawal. Doses were escalated and reduced over those days based on severity of withdrawal – ie day 1 was a low dose, peaking at day 3, then reducing until day 5-6. What exact doses you’ll need is dependent on the size of your habit.

Let us know how you go, and what you decide on.

Author: Thegreatestislove

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 11:27 pm

BeautifulDisaster, I am happy to hear that you are trying to figure out a way to get into suboxone therapy with your own doctor. I will have all my digits crossed for you I sincerely hope you can find a resolution to that soon. As far as them disqualifying you as a patient….. I guess that would really depend on the doctors personal feelings about how you have been obtaining your subs. Suboxone doctors KNOW we are addicts though otherwise we would’nt be coming in to see them for suboxone to begin with so if I were in your situation and I found a sub doc I wouldnt take any chances on them assuming you have been abusing suboxone by obtaining it on the street so I would not lie but i would not spill all the beans at first. Get in with your doctor really good before you tell the whole story. Usually they will want you to be in minor withdrawals when you come to your first visit to be inducted, so make sure to stop your subs at least three days before your appt, so you will be in some withdrawals. tell them about your original drug of choice and that you have been addicted to it for however long you were, and if they ask if you have ever tried suboxone before do NOT LIE they have tests to specifically test for bupe. just say yes a friend of mine is in therapy and has been encouraging me to get into sub therapy so I did take a suboxone from her to see if it would help me. Then explain that when you noticed how it took all your cravings away you knew you needed to get into treatment right away. leave it at that. Then when the time is right and you have been seeing your doc for a few months and they give you a chance or ask you to tell your story then you can fess up that you got them from a friend for a while after you found out they worked so well for you until you were able to get in to see a doctor for a script. does this make sense? I hope I explained that right….

Author: honeybun

Posted: Tue May 21, 2013 11:57 pm

Just my 2 cents

If Suboxone helped my 600mg a day habit, I would say it would help yours. Just my opinion, but taking that first step is the hardest, but its worth it. Good luck!!

Author: carazai

Posted: Wed May 22, 2013 12:23 am

So, I was looking for a coupon for my generic Ambien which for some reason is not being covered by my medicaid.. $40 for a month’s worth . I went to goodrx, put in my info and it gave me a coupon says I can get it at walmart for $6.94(and hinted I may be able to get it for $2.xx at bi-lo) so I will be doing the real checking out of this tomorrow. and report back how it went.

So I checked on the suboxone prices (even though medicaid pays mine.. 75 8mg strips of brand for $3.40)and the regular, brand, came back in the $600’s but the generic.. well you see.. 2-300 depending on pharmacy. which surprised me because my doc was talking to me about the new generic being out, but that its the same price.
so I thought Id drop you guys a note, and maybe help somebody.

have a good night.

if anybody has had success/failure with goodrx coupons, I’d love to know.

Author: isaydig

Posted: Wed May 22, 2013 3:41 am

beautiful disaster,
i know how you feel about starting 12 step meetings. other than my VERY first one when i was 18…my REAL first one was in when i was 22 (I’m 34 now) and I was hurting so badly i had no other options. i ended up (luckily) finding a Friday night 10pm candlelight "young people’s" meeting and everyone was so welcoming…instant best friends. and most of them are still around today (other than the ones who either relapsed and never came back or relapsed and died)…but the group stayed pretty strong and I will still go to that same location for 8pm "regular" meetings on occasion just because i love everyone there so much. i’d love to say no one in meetings will judge you, but it’s just not the truth. the truth is, it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks, because you’re there for you….and those who spend their time "shunning" you are the ones you want to avoid at ALL COSTS. you’ll find people you click with. i just sat there quietly listening to certain people who sounded happy and free and then i clung to them like crazy. i got a sponsor immediately then another, then another, then another, until i finally found someone i could truly be honest with. i’ve let my sponsor know i’m detoxing with suboxone and i didn’t get any judgment…just some sympathy…everyone knows how hard it is to get off of methadone and suboxone. there are people in the meetings who will spew crap like "if you’re on subs or methadone you’re not sober!"…and WHO CARES! you’re not taking it to get high, you’re taking it to stay ‘clean’…you won’t have to be on it forever. the thing i learned over the past decade about addiction is that if left "untreated" it only gets worse. the drug is just a SYMPTOM of a larger problem…what’s the problem, you ask??—ME! we are the problem. selfishness and self centeredness. we think it’s all about us, we think we are in the WORST situation, we think we’ve done the WORST things…but you learn super fast that if it has a name, at least half the people in the meetings have done it too i felt so alone before i started meetings and even for a while in the beginning but i sat around long enough to get comfortable because i was in so much pain. i honestly thought i would never relapse again, but i basically started feeling so good being sober that i just got lazy and stopped working on myself, my spirituality suffered, my home life suffered, and i said "F" it. so here i am in this chat room with some of the best people in the world. we are amazing people with problems. we aren’t problem people though. we can all get through this! you basically summed up untreated addiction in your last reply when you said you realized it just gets harder trying to do it alone. that’s the thing…addiction has to be TREATED. obviously there is no cure, but we definitely have a daily reprieve from dope, based on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. it’s so simple but it’s so freaking hard! all i have to do is the "next right thing", clean up "my side of the street", and help others to achieve sobriety after working all 12 steps myself. i just realized that after over a decade in the meetings, the "God" thing drove me out. they say you just need a "higher power" but the AA big book constantly mentions the word GOD and i just can’t get down with that. we have a buddhist meetup group every sunday at my house and that’s how i maintain my spirituality…..i just got lazy:( after i’m off this suboxone crap, i’m definitely letting my doc know about the xanax because i know it can be fatal. and i have to tell her the suboxone didn’t help me get off the xanax. i just hope she will help me taper since i’ve been buying them "off the streets". first things first though. this is my 2nd night without any sleep so i’m just sitting around watching the minutes tick slooooowly by..hoping my mind will soon realize how absolutely exhausted my body is. Insomnia is the worst. Thanks for being here to chat with, share experience, strength and hope with. i really appreciate it more than you know!