Author: amber4.14.11

Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:32 am

I was looking at photos with my son from 1-2 yrs ago, and the ones of me while on just methadone, I totally have that ‘washed out’ look….
completely white, and like puffy too!!

I always had black rings under my eyes while using whatever, and I was ALWAYS sweating, even when I was just taking methadone…..

Thats the one thing I can say, I may be alittle more ‘sensitive’ to the cold while on subs, but I do NOT sweat profusely all the time….thats nice

and I too have lost about 30 pounds over the course of 10 months while on suboxone. its been really slow, but the doc says thats the good way to lose wieght. and I have color in my face now,,,, look like I actually see the outdoors too. (not all white as a ghost)

Just wanted to add that.
Oh, and I cant really see my pupils real well in any of the photos. I actually think my eyes look brighter while on sub than anything else. I definitely had the ‘stoned’ look while on methadone……(probably cuz I abused it, LOL)

Author: BWG707

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 4:22 pm

Hello, I’ll just start right into my story. I’ve been taking Methadone , Vicadin, and at times Soma and Temazapam for the last 4+ yrs. My max dosage was 50mg Methadone, 40mg Vicadin, and just occasional Somas and Temaz. I got to the point recently of taking 40mg Meth., 10mg Vic., and I stopped taking the Somas and Tamaz. So at the start of this mo. I started cutting back on my own. Today is Feb.16 and I’m taking only 10mg of Methadone. I cut back at the beginning of the mo. pretty fast but did not feel that bad so I kept cutting back. I got down to 15mg of Methadone and nothing else and stayed on that for about 5 or 6 days then I cut down to 10mg Meth., 1/2 a pill in the AM and then 1/2 a pill in tAbout the 2nd day of this I started feeling uncomfortable but not real bad. So now I’m going to a pain management Dr. that can use Suboxone. After everything that I have read I’m scared, I’ve heard both Horror stories and Very Easy Detox stories. Can someone please tell me what I should expect from Suboxone treatment? I’ve heard you have to be in acute withdrawal before even taking the Sub. Considering my dosage is there another way to get off Meth. easier. With that said I want to let you know that I will not be seeing the pain Dr. until the first week of next mo. and also I never got "High" from the Meth. it was never a problem of wanting more and the mental and psyc. addiction is really pretty non-existent for me. I have no desire to keep taking pills or to get high. One more thing It was very easy for me to completely stop drinking Alcohol and I stopped smoking ciggies after 30+yrs. cold turkey without ant problems. So I do believe I have alot of will power. I’m looking to get off Meth. without any withdrawal. When my Dr prescribed it to me for severe Back and leg pain after 2 failed surgeries he said when time came to get off it it would be easy to just taper it back, with no withdrawls. If I would have know how powerfully addicting Meth is I would have never started it. The Dr. who I’m talking about has since taken another job and moved. I would appreciate any replies.

Author: BWG707

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 5:15 pm

If I’m only taking about 10 to 20 mg of Meth. a day would it be easier to just taper off or would Suboxone or even something else be easier? I have been on Meth. for 4+ yrs., never more than 50mg a day, recently got down to 10mg a day (so far for about 21/2 days) and haven’t felt too awful bad. I plan on trying to stay at 10mg a day for the next 2 weeks until I go to pain management. I just want to know what people with experience would do? I need to find out what type of plan the pain Dr. might suggest. I want to know what my best options are.

Author: jonathanm1978

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 5:47 pm

It’s pretty definitive that even if you do suffer low testosterone, it’s not enough of a reason to continue life as an actively-seeking addict on opiate pain meds. The pros outweigh the cons, TREMENDOUSLY.

If I had to take my preference, I’d MUCH rather be on Suboxone and suffer low testosterone (what’s the "worst" this can do to you/for you, besides low sex drive??) than to be seeking those Oxycontins and abusing prescription pain meds like I was doing and eventually winding up behind bars (or worse, 6ft under)…

Low testosterone is a possibility..but it’s a hit or miss from what I gather. I’ve been on Suboxone for 3+ years now, and just now started talking with my doctor about testosterone…he’s going to test me on my next visit and see if my levels are OK. No reason really, I don’t have any complaints…but just to make sure.

So don’t let this deter you from what’s important…because you cannot allow something as minor as that keep you from living a normal life without the cloud that opiates place on us.

Author: slashNaxl

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 6:30 pm

40 mgs is plenty to taper with…believe me. You may not think so right now, since you’ve been taking 12mgs a day for the past month, but I’ve done a few tapers with 1 8mg pill. Like the previous poster said, break up the pills into tiny pieces, like crumb sized. Or, don’t break it up, just break off a tiny bit from the pill each time you need some. But absolutely do NOT rationalize to yourself to take more than you NEED. If you do that, you will probably be in for a world of pain once you do run out.

Author: jonathanm1978

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 6:45 pm

Gettingthere wrote:

Fireman – I actually saw my sub doc a week ago today for my induction, so I’m a week without pills I already feel like a new person! I’ve done things just in the past week that I haven’t done in years & I’m currently planning a vacation with my kids. Vacations have always been iffy because I had to plan them around my addiction…. So sad. Yes, I have really been through a lot – my original post is just the super quick version leaving out most of the Really terrible things. Thank you for your support, It means more than I can express!

It’s amazing how much we mold our lives around our addiction…the things that we don’t do, or can’t do because we may not have enough "powder energy" to last…or something may happen while gone and not be able to get more pills…

I do SO many things now that I used to be totally against when I was eating pills…it’s amazing how Suboxone performs, and has that "gives you your life back" feeling…
I remember my induction…it reminds me of a turtle slowly coming out of it’s shell in the way that the withdrawals went away. It was a slow, progressive feeling of warmth that swept over me, and in a matter of 1 hour it was like a new me.

I remember the first weekend, you can read MY story in the "My Induction Story" section..but long story short, my wife and I went to a family reunion on Friday evening, it was 400 miles away from home. Earlier that day, I had inducted with my Suboxone, probably around 2pm..and we left out of Central Alabama headed to Slidell, Louisiana at around 5pm or so..

The drive was mostly my doing, and it was my family that was having the reunion…my wife and I had been separated, living apart from one another….for probably 8 months. This was our first time "together", because I had been living with this other girl that I "THOUGHT" I loved so dearly, and my wife and I were in the process of getting a divorce. We weren’t back together, and she informed me that she was just going along with me to see my family..because she had been a part of my family for almost 10 years then.

I didn’t have any transportation at the time of the family reunion…my wife had moved in with her mom & dad, and used her tax money to buy her a car…so she had a vehicle…and was working at the time. As it happened, the weekend that this reunion was happening was also her long weekend off of work. I had asked her if I could borrow her car since she didn’t have to work, and she was somewhat ok with the idea..but didn’t give me a definite answer. The girl that I "loved oh so much" while high, she was still living here, and I had told this girl that my wife was going to let me use her car to go see my family..so things were cool with that. She didn’t want to go, because my wife and I weren’t divorced yet, and she wanted to spend the weekend with her mom anyway…so I was homefree for that weekend. The girl knew I was going to take my kids with me, because it was their family too..so she didn’t find it odd that my wife came over here after I got back from my induction and I loaded up my wife’s car with my clothes for the weekend…she thought that I was going to leave here, take my wife back to her mom’s house, drop her off, and head out to Mississippi/Louisiana. Which I thought was the plan too, because like I said above, my wife hadn’t told me that she was going to let me use her car for sure..I just knew that my stuff was loaded in the trunk and we were headed to the local town (which was also on the way to her mom’s.)

My induction went great, I felt great…and I was feeling the past flooding back on me like a ton of bricks. All the emotions that went along with it too…the Suboxone did a GREAT job of helping me get back to feeling normal. Only thing I really noticed was the Friday, Saturday and Sunday night after my induction on Friday evening, I had night sweats..probably from that poison leaving my body (opiates, I was coming down from Oxycontin when I inducted)…

So when we hit the road, I asked my wife.."what are you doing..are you going to spend the weekend with me?"

Take into account that my wife had seen me go into Suboxone treatment, and she had come over to "visit" a few weekends before this one…she knew that the girl was gone to her moms, and that I was home alone …so when her midnight shift job let her go home early..she called me to see if she could come spend the night because …and I quote…"it’s too late and I am too sleepy to drive all the way to mom’s right now..nothing else..i just want to come sleep there."

I thought that was odd of her, because we had been apart for SO long..and she wouldn’t even consider "being" with me…and once the girl moved in, I never even asked, or thought it was possible. That really hurt my wife, and once I got clean, it really hurt me that I did that to her..but that’s another story.
Anyway..to shorten this a bit..she went with me to my family reunion. We slept together (of course, we didnt do nothing at my family’s house..but it SURE was tempting.)
I should also make a point to say that it was about 4 months before this the last time I "got any" from the girl living here. I wouldn’t touch her, because I was disgusted with myself. Even high as a kite, I still felt terrible because I had moved a girl in here, thinking I was in love, and I wasn’t. I only used the girl to get my drugs, because she gave me all kinds of credit cards and such. So I couldn’t bring myself to sleep with her.
I told my wife this, but she didn’t believe me..because our whole marriage I had shown the sex drive of an adolescent teenage boy..always horny, and always wanted it…so she found it hard to believe that I was turning down sex with someone. It kinda sunk in when I told her that the thought of having sex with someone else now disgusted me, and made me sick to my stomach…because I still loved my wife. I didn’t KNOW that I loved her…because the pills hid the reality..

But I slept next to her, and held her close to me the entire time that weekend…because I felt so ‘secure’ by just having her close to me.

And since we had already been "together" a couple of weeks before that trip..it was even more apparent that I was still in love with her. I even went through the trouble of getting my wedding band out of the safe before this trip, and hiding it in my pocket so I could put it back on..because after all, I WAS still married to her.

That trip was the most memorable part of my Suboxone induction..because it all happened right there together.

This was April 19, 2008..and as you can tell, I remember DISTINCTLY what went on. And we came back home that Monday morning around 2am…slept in OUR bed (well, a little more than just sleep went on…but it was the beginning)..and she hasn’t left my side since. The girl was due to come back from her mom’s house on that Monday evening around 4pm. Wife had to be at work on her job at 3pm that Monday evening…so the wife left for work, and i told her that i was taking care of "things", and she could come back that night when she got off work at 11pm…and nobody would be there but me and the kids…and that’s what happened. When the girl pulled up the drive from her weekend away, I met her on the porch, and told her that I couldn’t do it anymore. The first thing she said to me was "you spent the weekend with Misty didn’t you?"

She guessed at it, because the entire weekend i was gone, I avoided my ringing cell phone…and wouldn’t talk to her. So she knew something was up. I kept telling her that I was in a bad spot for cell service..

Sorry to get so long-winded with my post in your discussion..but that’s just PART of my story.
We’ll celebrate 14 years of marriage in June of this year.

Author: jonathanm1978

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 6:51 pm

I personally don’t have any experience with methadone, and I viewed your question..

I would much rather give NO advice than to give the wrong advice, as I’m not in a place where I can tell you what your course of action should be.

Chances are that the people who are reading your question are in the same boat.
Just wait a bit and see what happens after a day or two.

I’ve noticed most people come on this site after 6pm…and before 11pm.

I’m normally on the site between 2am and 6am..because it’s my daily routine to wake up and hit the internet first thing..that way I can do other stuff during the day and not sit at the computer.

Author: slashNaxl

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 7:05 pm

Wanted to post yesterday, but it was very similar to the previous day…so here I am now at day 4, and I think I’m turning the corner. The only lingering WD symptom is the damn coldness/chills. That’s been getting better, I think, over the past day or so…but it’s hard to tell…it kind of comes in waves…I’ll feel fine for a few hours, then suddenly I’ll feel clammy, cold, uncomfortable for about an hour or so, then it goes away…

Sleeping last night was ok, except I woke up at 3am with terrible leg pains…they just ached so bad that I couldn’t get back to sleep…I was breakdancing in bed for about an hour until I fell back asleep til I had to get up for work at 6.

The best thing I can say is I have had pretty much zero depression, and no diarrhea…not sure how I avoided those things, but I have.

Author: garyit

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 7:39 pm

ok thank you very much for your reply and information

Author: sweet16

Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 7:44 pm

Good Luck lady, I am going to send positive thoughts to you. I know you will get thru this. Blessings