Author: VelvetUnderground719
Posted: Tue Jul 30, 2013 12:19 pm
As a person who is finishing up a Sub taper, I wanted to get other people’s opinions about the role of work in recovery. (I re-started the taper 10 days ago, using 0.35 MG of Subutex daily, and it is going much better than my taper using the films. I have a digestive disorder and the Naloxone exacerbated it.) I personally have been unable to hold down a job at various points in my life, and at other points, I have worked for years, while my health declined. Despite this, I have mostly, until recently (i.e. the past 18-22 months), been shockingly successful professionally, even while being the target of bullying, sabotage, sexual or physical harassment, and/or abuse at nearly every job.
Other info: I have a digestive disorder, treatment pending. Also, I have severe PTSD and panic disorder, mostly from childhood/adolescent abuse unrelated to work, although it’s worsened thanks to adult abuse related to work and college. My psychiatric illnesses have not responded to treatment, and I’m finding that in this stage of recovery, even THINKING about work exacerbates my depression and anxiety. I personally suspect that my mental health issues make me a target; however, I have spent two decades throwing tens of thousands of good dollars after bad medicine. In many cases, psychiatry made me worse – and I have tried every type of therapy and every class or drugs in the book. Increasingly, I am learning that it’s very difficult to treat PTSD because it is the result of repeated exposure to very negative or damaging experiences that literally change one’s brain, and not an organic mental illness. Since late 2011, I have been keeping SSDI on the table as a back-up plan. I hate myself daily for even thinking about this, but increasingly, my health has become an impediment to working even an 8-hour day.
Work and career, I personally feel, is something that gets short shrift in recovery discussions, so I’d like to hear where YOU stand on it. Do you work, or do you not work? Did work make recovery easier or harder? If you do not work, what is your next step, and do you feel guilty or worthless right now for not working? If you do work, how did you find work and make the mental transition from "sick" to "recovery?" I NEED your input today. Thanks so much!!