Aqua’s Taper Journal

Author: ClearAqua

Posted: Mon Nov 26, 2012 4:38 pm

Hello! Been reading around for a bit before posting and I still see Romeo and Laddertripper….made me so happy to see you two!

I didn’t know whether to start a new thread or continue my old one and decided to continue the old one as it IS part of my journey.

Reading from the beginning, you can see that I started the "Rapid Sub-Taper of All Sub-Tapers". I ended up in the "Rapid Sub-Taper Depression of All Sub-Taper Depressions". Looking back, the story is:

From March 2011 thru Sep 2011, I dropped from a 3.5 year 24 mgs/Sub daily to 2 mgs daily. I went so rapidly at first that I triggered major anxiety which spiraled into major depression. I did all this thinking I was having kidney/bladder probs that might require surgery. It was a stone, which did not require anything at all LOL But, my ordeal had begun. I posted here until, exhausted from depression, I did not even post anymore.

With my doctor’s assistance, we kept inching up the Sub to where we found I was comfortable again and the depression was dealt with and that was 8 mgs. I have been on 8 mgs this year. The depression/anxiety is gone….don’t remember how long it took but realized one day that it had passed. I went into bad "can’t get out of bed…what is the meaning of life" depression. I made it through and let me say that the whole "sub, endorphins" thing is nothing to play with. You must give your brain ample time when tapering to "pick up the ball", so to speak. So, here I stand, end of year 2012, on 8 mgs/day and stabilized. I am ready to begin the taper again but this time (boy, have I EVER learned) it will be very, very slow. I don’t care if it takes 2-3 years to taper….I will never, ever put myself through the hell of a rapid taper ever again.

Ladder, I read some posts that said you had finally made the jump! I am sooooooo happy for you! Ecstatic! You did it! And Romeo….I am just proud to see you still here and giving your words of wisdom and encouragement to those who need it.

My plan is to finish out the year and on Jan 1, drop to 6 mgs and just stay there until I am sure I am acclimated. No time frame this time….no hurry. From there, I plan to take it down 1 mg at a time until I hit 3 mgs…then I will start dropping in .25 increments. Again, with no hurry and no time frame. What I did to myself is scary and it is totally uncalled for. I had to learn a little life lesson called "patience" Smile

Happy to just be at a point where I can start the taper again.

Happy Holidays to all Very Happy