Author: nervousmtb
Posted: Fri Feb 03, 2012 11:37 pm
Okay, so I need some opinions here on what to do about my situation. Heres a brief background.. I’ve been on and off for about 5-6 years addicted to opiates such as vicodin, percs, and roxies . It started with a shoulder injury and from there that was the start of them all. I liked the feeling and all and it boosted my confidence and energy. After awile of wasting money and realizing I didnt want to live life like that anymore, going through terrible WD’s so many times, and two hospital visits for the panic attacks from WD’s, someone gave me some suboxone to try. It helped me and I had no cravings whatsoever for pills anymore. I continued to receive from a friend and eventually wanteded to stop so I did. I tapered a little, but wasnt on such a high dose to begin with (1.5-2mg). Got down to about 1 mg and jumped. I had WD’s for awile and never really got to feel "normal" again before i started to take them again. A close friend started a program and was easy access to get to me , plus i feel that I did not taper well enough and planned to stay on it for maybe 6 more months and slowly taper this time and see a therapist. I am currently on 2 mg of suboxone a day and had a plan to taper 1/4 down every 2 weeks. This was before I ended up getting pregnant. I am currently in my early 30’s and me and my husband definatly knew we wanted a child. I just did not think it would happen just yet. Im now terrified and so mad at myself for starting up on it again. Im a generally anxious person to begin with and the anxiety I have that I may hurt my baby in anyway kills me. I should be so incredibly happy , and I am, its just that the worrying is taking over and I want to know what is best for my baby being that im not getting them prescribed to me and Im reading about so many things on whats right and wrong. I have a great job with insurance and work full time and dont think ill be able to handle wd’s again knowing that im carrying a baby, and possibly causing harm. And what will my OB say? Im not getting them prescribed or seeing a therapist yet and so many negative things are running through my head right now. Im supposed to be happy and this whole thing is ruining it knowing that both chioces that I will have to make can lead to harming the baby. I do not know what to do , my husband has been wanting a baby together for just about the last 10 years we been together and thought he couldnt even have children for some reason, so it is killing me worrying too much about the health of my child. Its all I care about now , nothing else. If someone has any advise for me , that would be greatly appreciated. How do I tell the OB? and do I see a suboxone doctor myself now and explain to them the situation im in and maybe they will help me?? Or will they not bc Im pregnant or currently taking Sub? Im so nervous . All I want is for the best thing for my child.. Thank You to anyone that took the time out to read my post and willing to help. ..